A similar list comes to mind in my idealized romances. Learning to say no, respect my body, set boundaries, and coming to truly enjoy being alone instead of proving a point on independence - these lessons only came with space and time. Starting later in life gave time for principles to develop.

Appreciate you getting into specifics too - so important for real dialogue. I watched resentment for complex traumas tear men up, and see it cycle into their relationships. The tropes they use to explain away their pain only causes more resentment and suffocates their compassion for their partner.